Month: June 2018

It’s hard to keep track these days of all the fallen CEOs as a result of #metoo, but the Intel situation may leave people shaking their heads in confusion. Brian Krzanich voluntarily resigned after an internal investigation revealed that he’d had a consensual affair with a subordinate. The relationship allegedly lasted for ten years but was over before Krzanich became CEO in 2013.

The woman reportedly still works at Intel and didn’t work closely with Krzanich. Evidently, the affair violated Intel’s strict rules against fraternization, which outlawed dating subordinates who reported to leaders directly or indirectly.

Are leaders vulnerable? Unfortunately, I have had to help several CEOs sort out the fallout from similar situations. In those cases, the male CEOs thought they were having a consensual relationship but sometime after a break-up, the subordinate claimed harassment: that she had only engaged in the affair in order to keep her job.

When is dating harassment? Of course, if it is not welcome, it is harassment for a boss to require dating as a condition of employment yet hook-ups are often messier than that. When is voluntary actually unwelcome? Even if the dating is between peers, and all the behavior occurs outside the workplace, organizations can get involved if outside behavior bleeds back into work.

What about third parties? Then there’s third parties, who can claim paramour preference, when a boss gives various favors to someone he or she is dating.

Off duty conduct? Adding to the confusion are laws in many states that bar employers from disciplining or terminating employees who do things outside of work, that are otherwise legal – like smoking or marching in KKK parades. These laws have been interpreted to prevent employers from outright bans on dating.

Best practices? Because of all these Gordian knots, most of our clients sanction dating between peers, as long as it’s voluntary, yet bar most dating between bosses and subordinates as conflicts of interests.

What Should You Do?

• Leaders: If you are a leader, realize that dating anyone over whom you have actual or implied authority leaves you vulnerable, even if you believe it is voluntary.
• Ethical concerns: If two employees are dating, even if they are married to other people and you have ethical problems with their behavior, resist the urge to interfere or gossip. Such behavior can create defamation claims, in addition to workforce disruption.
• Policies: If you are considering changing your policies on dating, make sure that you consult your employment attorney, in order to understand all the implications.
• Reporting: If you believe that someone is violating your policies, make sure you know the facts before you report them to HR or your ethics hotline. The path of true love rarely runs clearly; rumors may be just plain wrong.
• Training: Make sure that you step-up training on these issues and that you coach leaders on power imbalances.

What Do You Think?

Is dating at work ever appropriate? Have you ever participated in a workplace relationship? How did it turn out? Let us know your comments.

Did You Know

I had the privilege of speaking at Berkeley last week on Conflict Management for Start-ups at the True Ventures, True University, a two-day seminar this successful venture capital group runs for the founders and other leaders of their companies. What a privilege to speak to this excited, energized and successful group of start-ups!

What Should You Do?

Before wading into the thicket of conflict, assess your own style and that of those you are likely to be in conflict with. These are our automatic, knee-jerk styles that we use when our back is against the wall. All of them have pros and cons. The key is to be conscious in which style you choose, and to know how to interact with co-workers who might use a different style.

Here’s an abbreviated version of our test.

CONFLICT STYLES:

 

Style 1: 

Attacks conflict, likes to argue and debate, threaten and

intimidate. Highly competitive. Avoids concessions. Can be useful in all-out wars.

Style 2:        

Usually accommodates. Can be extremely loyal and has a need to please people and to be liked. Useful for team-building and raising morale.

Style 3:

Avoids conflict.  Can be difficult to pin down to determine interests. Can be useful in avoiding unimportant disputes or petty disagreements.

Style 4: 

Triangulates conflict, talks to other people rather than the person or persons directly involved. Can be useful in building consensus among groups with little power.

Style 5: 

An effective leader approaches conflict with skill and balance. Uses other approached only when necessary after much thought.  Constantly applies the ten steps of conflict resolution.

Which one of these styles are you?

Which one of these styles is the person with whom you are currently in conflict?

What Do You Think?

Has knowing your style helped you approach conflict differently? We would love to hear your thoughts.

Did You Know

All of our leadership classes include a section on conflict. We also do specialized conflict workshops.

Call or write me to discuss your options at: 303-216-1020 or Lynne@workplacesthatwork.com

Learn more about our training offerings and check out our team members at:

www.workplacesthatwork.com

Be sure to read Lynne’s book The Power of a Good Fight and learn to 

embrace conflict to drive productivity, creativity and innovation.

  

  

On the face of the news reports, the resignation of John Lasseter, Pixar co-founder and Toy Story director, seems to reflect the height of absurdity for the #metoo movement.

Have we really reached the point where you can’t hug someone at work? Full disclosure here: I’m a hugger. I hug everyone; sometimes I hug people I just met. But did you know that not everyone is a hugger?

With regard to Lasseter, however, the story, as usual, is more complicated than the media reports. Lasseter originally went on leave last November but only resigned last Friday after Disney (which owns Pixar) completed an investigation.

According to reports, not only did Lasseter engage in unwelcome and prolonged hugs in business meetings — which included whispering in women’s ears while he was hugging — but he also allegedly engaged in:

• Unwelcome and prolonged kissing on the lips;
• Making comments about ‘physical attributes’;
• Touching women’s thighs; and
• Drinking to excess at company events.

In fact, Lasseter’s behavior was so frequent that women allegedly devised a move known as “the Lasseter”, an evasive tactic designed to avoid Lasseter’s grabs at their thighs.

All of our harassment and discrimination presentations include time-tested ways for people to determine if their own and others’ behavior is appropriate.

Call or write me to discuss your options at: 303-216-1020 or Lynne@workplacesthatwork.com

Learn more about our training offerings and check out our team members at:

www.workplacesthatwork.com

Be sure to read Lynne’s book on sexual harassment.