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Newsletter – How and Why Should You Promote Civility in the Workplace?

August 20, 2018

How and Why Should You Promote Civility in the Workplace?

Many of my clients are starting to group today’s hot topics – harassment, discrimination, bullying, unconscious bias and microaggressions – into uncivil behavior. Focusing on their values of respect, they are moving toward creating civility training to make sure they have the highest level of workplace culture.

What is civility? 

Civility represents the social norms and rules that should be followed in order to positively and productively relate with others.

Civility promotes respect, courtesy, inclusiveness, consideration and a rational approach to conflicts.

What is incivility?
  • Unintentional incivility occurs.  People assume, for example, that what is acceptable in one workplace is acceptable in another, or engage in microaggressions.
  • Intentional incivility also occurs. Examples would include bullying behavior such as verbally attacking or bullying a co-worker.
  • Other examples of incivility include: using crude or abusive language, discounting someone else’s contribution, sabotaging an individual with gossip or other untrue statements.
  • Discrimination or harassment:  Are extreme and illegal examples of uncivil behavior.
What are the advantages of promoting civility?
  • Promotes a great place to work;
  • Increases morale and productivity;
  • Reduces turnover and absenteeism; and
  • Helps prevent more extreme behavior from developing such as bullying, harassment and discrimination.
What Should You Do?
Encourage your organization to promote civility because:
  • There is no escaping other people – most workplaces require working well with others to accomplish many tasks.
  • It is consistent with most organization’s values.
  • It is the right thing to do.
Include discussions of civility in your other presentations and discussions on:
  • Organizational values;
  • Harassment and discrimination; and
  • Leadership.

Help leaders understand that increasing civility reduces your chances of having to deal with other inappropriate behavior such as harassment and bullying.

What Do You Think?

Do you encourage discussions of civility in your workplace? How have people responded?

Did You Know

We include discussions of civility in all of our sessions on leadership, harassment and discrimination.
Call or write us at: 303-216-1020 or
Learn more about our training offerings and check out our team members at:
Be sure to read Lynne’s book “The Power of a Good Fight” and learn how conflict can help drive productivity, creativity and innovation. 
  
Workplaces That Work | (303) 216-1020 | lynne@workplacesthatwork.com
3985 Wonderland Hill | Suite 106 | Boulder, CO 80304

Newsletter – How is Your Commitment to Continuing Education on Diversity and Inclusion: Will You See Blakkklansman?

August 13, 2018

How is Your Commitment to Continuing Education on Diversity and Inclusion: Will You See Blakkklansman?

I saw Blakkklansman yesterday and the movie is still haunting me. In this film, movie maker Spike Lee portrays a fictionalized version of a real-life Colorado Springs black cop who infiltrated the KKK during the 1970s.
Bound to be studied in film school and the subject of much political debate, I loved the movie as a rollicking suspense story, as well as a politicized history lesson. Surprisingly, a white audience completely filled the theater on an early Sunday afternoon. We laughed, cried and sat on the edge of our seats, unsure of what was to come, as Spike Lee – in typical fashion – messed with our heads.
I must admit that I also loved the nod to my alma mater, The Colorado College.
Ron Stillman, the black cop, attends a rally organized by the CC Black Student Union and falls for a fictionalized version of the student president of the group.

The film is not for everyone, but if you’re interested in expanding your views – one way or the other – on the current debate on race in this country, you need to see it, in order to be part of the conversation.

What Should You Do?
  • Be cautious discussing the movie in the workplace. The film is filled with historically accurate but completely inappropriate comments about race, religion and gender.
  • Be open to other views. Clearly political, the movie will enrage some viewers and enrapture others.    Be willing to listen and learn.
  • Use the movie as a springboard to increase your own knowledge of race issues in this country.  Follow-up with your own research and learning.
Did You Know

Our workshops on harassment, discrimination, diversity and inclusion don’t shy away from discussing race and religion in an appropriate and educational way.

Call or write us at: 303-216-1020 or
Learn more about our training offerings and check out our team members at:
Be sure to read Lynne’s book “The Power of a Good Fight” and learn how conflict can help drive productivity, creativity and innovation. 
  
Workplaces That Work | (303) 216-1020 | lynne@workplacesthatwork.com
3985 Wonderland Hill | Suite 106 | Boulder, CO 80304

Newsletter – Do You Know How to Change Someone’s Mind?

August 6, 2018

Do You Know How to Change Someone’s Mind?

Most leaders experience ample opportunities to practice their persuasion skills. Surprisingly, however, in my experience, most have no clue what really works. Many times they lecture individuals or groups with broad abstractions, trying to convince them to follow their lead.
When leaders speak about new visions during change, for example, they are frequently frustrated because their staff doesn’t seem to understand or adopt their message. What the research shows, is that employees know what the new direction will be and can articulate the change well. The information they want, however, has to do with specifics: what resources will be available for them to navigate the new endeavor.

Similarly, when leaders want to change someone’s mind about company values or policies, they lecture or argue. What works instead is individual stories or asking questions and listening. For hard science on this method, listen to this podcast For Your Reconsideration  from the always amusing This American Life.

 

 What Should You Do?
  • Ask what’s in it for them? If you can’t articulate the specific benefits of how this change will help them or how they are going to navigate the change, you will lose your audience.
  • Use stories. Stories move people more than abstractions. The best stories come from your own life experience but if you don’t have one, beg or borrow one. Just be sure you protect attribution and anonymity, if applicable.
  • Ask questions and listen. Research shows that people trust answers that they come to on their own. If you know someone has strong opinions that you want to change, ask how they arrived at that opinion. Listen to their answers. Use open ended questions that begin with who, what, where, when to draw people out.
  • Meet with them in person. Research from political campaigns shows that people trust politicians more when they meet them in person. If you have a large span of control as a leader, of course, it may be difficult to meet with them each individually but take every opportunity to do so.

Check out our website. We have many more articles and resources for dealing with persuasion and conflict: www.workplacesthatwork.com

 

Did You Know
All of our workshops utilize exercises and a Socratic method of teaching so that people can come to their own conclusions about difficult subjects.
Call or write us at: 303-216-1020 or
Learn more about our training offerings and check out our team members at:
Be sure to read Lynne’s book “The Power of a Good Fight” and learn how conflict can help drive productivity, creativity and innovation.
 
  
Workplaces That Work | (303) 216-1020 | lynne@workplacesthatwork.com
3985 Wonderland Hill | Suite 106 | Boulder, CO 80304

Newsletter – How Do You Referee Free Speech Fights at Work?

July 30, 2018

How Do You Referee Free Speech Flights at Work?

Arguing about Trump. Fussing about political protesters. Razing the Russians. Disagreeing about affirmative action on college campuses. We are polarized and paranoid these days, especially when it comes to listening to opinions different from our own.
Inevitably, these spats spill over into the workplace. Politics can be fun to talk about at work. With some of these hot button issues, however, many people cannot discuss them without making comments that veer off into the abyss of talk that crosses the line into harassing, derogatory or demeaning speech. As a leader, what’s your role as referee? Must you allow all of these rumbles in your office or shop?

What Should You Do?

Limit unacceptable speech. The short answer for most workplaces is no, you are not required to allow anyone to say anything at work, even if it is part of a spirited break room debate. You can and should set rules about behavior at work, including acceptable and unacceptable speech.
But don’t we have free speech rights at work? Contrary to what many of our workshop participants seem to believe, you generally do not have free speech rights at work. The First Amendment usually applies to government action. Private employers can make rules about behavior, including rules about speech. We all give up something in exchange for a paycheck; the ability to say and do whatever we want at work is one of the things we relinquish. You can make and enforce rules limiting speech that is harassing, discriminating or otherwise creates an environment that inhibits your goals.
But what about government employers and university campuses? These entities have different – and complicated – rules about speech and other forms of political expression. If you are a leader, be sure  to consult your employment counsel about how to handle these issues.

 

But what about the deeper issue of tolerating opposing views? For a deep dive into tolerating different opinions on college campuses and other forums these days, listen to the excellent Ted Radio Hour: “The Right to Speak”.

Did You Know
Our website includes many other articles and resources for handling these issues.
We cover free speech rights at work in our sessions on harassment, discrimination, diversity and inclusion.
Call or write us at: 303-216-1020 or
Learn more about our training offerings and check out our team members at:
Be sure to read Lynne’s books on affirmative action and sexual harassment.
 
   
Workplaces That Work | (303) 216-1020 | lynne@workplacesthatwork.com
3985 Wonderland Hill | Suite 106 | Boulder, CO 80304

Newsletter – Do You Know the Four Most Important Words to Retain Your Best People?

July 23, 2018

Do You Know the Four Most Important Words to Retain Your Best People?

In today’s labor market, you can’t afford to lose your best people. Finding good people in today’s tight job market is hard enough. Once you have a great employee, how do you make sure that no one swoops in and snatches them away from you?

A recruiting story.  My son, Nick, for example, is a talented musician, but like most in his field, he also needs a day job to make ends meet. He works selling phones, computers and other devices in a large retail store. Nick liked his job and his boss but was recruited away by a manager from another store who heard about his selling skills from her potential customer! She was trying to sell a phone to a prospect who said: “I just bought one from this young man at another store. You should get him to work here. He was terrific!” The assertive manager trotted over to my son’s store and offered him more money and more commission. Nick fled without giving his boss a chance to convince him to stay.
It happens. Your people are receiving calls from headhunters and other courageous recruiters. Don’t just sit back and assume your superstars will stay.

What Should You Do?

I’ve written about many techniques to keep your best people but one I find leaders forget: make sure they know you love them. Frequently tell them: I want you here. You would be surprised what power those four words have. Everyone wants to feel wanted. Don’t let your people languish without knowing you care.

Did You Know
We cover this and other techniques to retain the best in all our leadership and management classes.
Call or write us at: 303-216-1020 or
Learn more about our training offerings and check out our team members at:
Be sure to read Lynne’s book “We Need to Talk – Tough Conversations with Your Employee”
 
  
Workplaces That Work | (303) 216-1020 | lynne@workplacesthatwork.com
3985 Wonderland Hill | Suite 106 | Boulder, CO 80304

Newsletter – What Are the Two Things You Need to Make 360 Feedback Successful?

July 16, 2018

What Are the Two Things You Need to Make 360 Feedback Successful?

While we conduct individual EQi 2.0 assessments for our coaching clients, we also use 360 reviews, if they are willing to conduct them correctly.

We have seen a number of 360 reviews done incorrectly: questioning of the reviews that is confrontational, for example, or poor training and scrutiny of the reviewers, leading to useless or damaging results. How do you avoid these fates?

 

Two essentials: 1) make sure that the recipients gather the courage to receive the reviews in the correct spirit; and 2) utilize a variety of modalities in order to assure the most accurate results.

What Should You Do?

  • Courage. Recognize that receiving 360 reviews takes courage. While such assessments can be useful, leaders may receive news that is hard to hear, vague or confusing. Be prepared.
  • Use a variety of methods. We try to convince our clients to conduct 360 reviews with several different modalities. Ideally, we would start with confidential and anonymous written surveys. Some people can provide their thoughts more effectively this way and may also trust confidentiality more fully. After the written surveys, we then use either focus groups or individual interviews. Sometimes, your staff may feel more comfortable being honest if they are in a group. Others may feel safer with confidential individual sessions.
  • Use an outside expert to review the results. We do not provide the raw data to our coaching clients. We tabulate the results and sanitize any individual comments in an attempt to keep the feedback anonymous and confidential. Feedback on specific behavior is useful; feedback that focuses on individual personality conflicts is not. We do our best to screen out any comments that appear to be an attempt to sabotage an individual leader or that is just employee griping without any useable information. Giving someone the unfiltered data can damage a leader and engender potential retaliation against the staff member who provided the feedback.

What Do You Think?

What are your best ideas for making 360 feedback useful? Have you received feedback that was harmful? Do you trust the process? Send along your best tips and outcomes.
Did You Know

We provide a variety of tools for 360 feedback reviews. Call or write us at: 303-216-1020 or Lynne@workplacesthatwork.com Learn more about our training offerings and check out our team members at: www.workplacesthatwork.com


Be sure to read Lynne’s book “We Need to Talk – Tough Conversations with Your Boss” 
Workplaces That Work | (303) 216-1020 | lynne@workplacesthatwork.com
3985 Wonderland Hill | Suite 106 | Boulder, CO 80304

Newsletter – Do You Know the Number One Tool to Deal With a Problem Employee?

July 9, 2018

Do You Know the Number One Tool to Deal With a Problem Employee? 

Problem employees are the bane of any leader’s existence. They could be a problem because they’re incompetent, lazy, annoying or explosive. No matter, they still drive you crazy and you’re stuck trying to cope.
Perhaps you’ve let things go because they’re brilliant, a rain-maker or your boss’s nephew. Perhaps you let things go because other employees had yet to complain and suddenly, they’re all stepping up to express their concerns. Perhaps you just had your head in the sand, hoping that someone else would fix the issue.
What’s the number one mistake leaders 
at every level make in addressing 
problem employees? Delay.

When leaders delay, hoping for a miracle intervention from someone else, the situation doesn’t improve, it compounds. By delaying, you are damaging your standing with other employees who assume that you are unaware of the issue or afraid to address the person. Delay also damages morale of the employees who have to deal with the person without your support. Delay hurts your bottom line because you are not getting the productivity you need out of the problem employee.

 

What Should You Do?

  • Don’t wait.  While you should, of course, allow new employees time to learn the ropes, have a specific probationary period, consistent for all new employees. If someone is not hitting the mark after that period, deal with it, don’t wait for improbable rescue.
  • Communicate. Set expectations early and create a dialogue about whether members of your staff are successful at meeting expectations. Make sure you have frequent check-ins about what is working and what is not working.
  • Terminate. It’s a clichéd but true management mantra: it’s not the people you fire who cause you problems, it’s the people you don’t fire. I’m all in favor of giving people the time and the training they need to improve, performance improvement plans and the like, but once you’ve gone through those steps, move someone out of the organization in a compassionate way. Send them along with your best wishes and hopes that they are able to find a place that’s a better fit, but do it without dithering.

What Do You Think?

Have you (or other leaders in your organization) held on to a problem employee for too long? What were the consequences? What would you do differently next time? Let us know your thoughts.
Did You Know
All of our leadership and management classes cover the issue of courage in dealing with problem employees.

Call or write me to discuss your options at: 303-216-1020 or Lynne@workplacesthatwork.com

Learn more about our training offerings and check out our team members at:
Be sure to read Lynne’s book “Stop Pissing Me Off! What to do 
When the People You Work With Drive You Crazy!”
  

 
Workplaces That Work | (303) 216-1020 | lynne@workplacesthatwork.com
3985 Wonderland Hill | Suite 106 | Boulder, CO 80304

Newsletter – Time With a Leader is a Perk: How Are You Handing Yours Out?

July 2, 2018

Time With a Leader is a Perk: How Are You Handing Your Out?

 

If you are a leader, you are probably spending your days lurching from crisis to crisis, trying to put out fires before they burn down the house. Your time is at a premium; spending time with your troops is always on your list, but frequently ends up last.
If you are a staffer, you probably want more time with your boss for coaching, mentoring, or just a drink outside the office so that you can really get to know him or her. You would like more time, but you are not sure how to get it and you hesitate to ask for more.

“If you want to keep your staff, prioritize one-on-one coaching and mentoring.”

When I coach leaders, they usually don’t think of one-on-one time with their direct reports as a perk, and many times, they don’t want to spend more time with them because they fear a new barrage of problems or they just want to go home early and spend time with their family.

As one CEO I coach said: “I rated low on my 360 from my staff because they want more time with me. The problem is: I don’t want more time with them. They think I’m the Dad! I want them to solve their own problems.”

What Should You Do?

If you are a leader, consider the following:
  • Know your value. You probably have no idea what a valuable perk time with you is. Dole out the perk wisely.
  • Be fair. Spread out private coaching time as equally as you can. Make sure you are not spending more time with one gender or with reports who are also friends.
  • Make it a priority. If you want to keep your staff, prioritize one-on-one coaching and mentoring.
    Nothing is more valuable to your people; nothing will keep them around longer.

What Do You Think?

Leaders – do you spend enough coaching time with your staff?
Staff – Do you receive the time you need from your boss?

Let us know what you think?

Did You Know
We cover coaching and mentoring in all our management and leadership classes.

Call or write me to discuss your options at: 303-216-1020 or Lynne@workplacesthatwork.com

Learn more about our training offerings and check out our team members at:
Be sure to read Lynne’s book “We Need to Talk” – Tough Conversations with Your Employee
  
  

 
Workplaces That Work | (303) 216-1020 | lynne@workplacesthatwork.com
3985 Wonderland Hill | Suite 106 | Boulder, CO 80304

Newsletter – Could You be at Risk Like Intel’s CEO? Consensual Dating at Work

June 25, 2018

Could You be at Risk Like Intel’s CEO? Consensual Dating at Work

It’s hard to keep track these days of all the fallen CEOs as a result of #metoo, but the Intel situation may leave people shaking their heads in confusion. Brian Krzanich voluntarily resigned after an internal investigation revealed that he’d had a consensual affair with a subordinate. The relationship allegedly lasted for ten years but was over before Krzanich became CEO in 2013.

The woman reportedly still works at Intel and didn’t work closely with Krzanich. Evidently, the affair violated Intel’s strict rules against fraternization, which outlawed dating subordinates who reported to leaders directly or indirectly.

Are leaders vulnerable? Unfortunately, I have had to help several CEOs sort out the fallout from similar situations. In those cases, the male CEOs thought they were having a consensual relationship but sometime after a break-up, the subordinate claimed harassment: that she had only engaged in the affair in order to keep her job.

When is dating harassment? Of course, if it is not welcome, it is harassment for a boss to require dating as a condition of employment yet hook-ups are often messier than that. When is voluntary actually unwelcome? Even if the dating is between peers, and all the behavior occurs outside the workplace, organizations can get involved if outside behavior bleeds back into work.

What about third parties? Then there’s third parties, who can claim paramour preference, when a boss gives various favors to someone he or she is dating.

Off duty conduct? Adding to the confusion are laws in many states that bar employers from disciplining or terminating employees who do things outside of work, that are otherwise legal – like smoking or marching in KKK parades. These laws have been interpreted to prevent employers from outright bans on dating.

Best practices? Because of all these Gordian knots, most of our clients sanction dating between peers, as long as it’s voluntary, yet bar most dating between bosses and subordinates as conflicts of interests.

What Should You Do?

  • Leaders: If you are a leader, realize that dating anyone over whom you have actual or implied authority leaves you vulnerable, even if you believe it is voluntary.
  • Ethical concerns: If two employees are dating, even if they are married to other people and you have ethical problems with their behavior, resist the urge to interfere or gossip. Such behavior can create defamation claims, in addition to workforce disruption.
  • Policies: If you are considering changing your policies on dating, make sure that you consult your employment attorney, in order to understand all the implications.
  • Reporting: If you believe that someone is violating your policies, make sure you know the facts before you report them to HR or your ethics hotline. The path of true love rarely runs clearly; rumors may be just plain wrong.
  • Training: Make sure that you step-up training on these issues and that you coach leaders on power imbalances.

What Do You Think?

Is dating at work ever appropriate? Have you ever participated in a workplace relationship? How did it turn out? Let us know your comments.

Did You Know

All of our workshops on Leading Through Respect help leaders and employees understand the boundaries in workplace relationships.

Call or write me to discuss your options at: 303-216-1020 or Lynne@workplacesthatwork.com

Learn more about our training offerings and check out our team members at:

Be sure to read Lynne’s book on sexual harassment.
Workplaces That Work | (303) 216-1020 | lynne@workplacesthatwork.com
3985 Wonderland Hill | Suite 106 | Boulder, CO 80304

Newsletter – Do You Know What Conflict Style You Are? Knowing the Answer Can Make or Break Creativity, Productivity and Innovation

June 18, 2018

Do You Know What Conflict Style You Are? Knowing the Answer Can Make or Break Creativity, Productivity and Innovation

I had the privilege of speaking at Berkeley last week on Conflict Management for Start-ups at the True Ventures, True University, a two-day seminar this successful venture capital group runs for the founders and other leaders of their companies. What a privilege to speak to this excited, energized and successful group of start-ups!

While we covered the spectrum of moving conflict management into conflict transformation, what the group seemed most interested in learning about was our system of conflict styles.

They seemed to understand that learning about their own style during conflict, as well as the style of the other members of their team, could help drive success for their squad.

In our experience and research, styles can make or break your own ability to build teams.

What Should You Do?

Before wading into the thicket of conflict, assess your own style and that of those you are likely to be in conflict with. These are our automatic, knee-jerk styles that we use when our back is against the wall. All of them have pros and cons. The key is to be conscious in which style you choose, and to know how to interact with co-workers who might use a different style.

Here’s an abbreviated version of our test.

CONFLICT STYLES:

 

Style 1: 
Attacks conflict, likes to argue and debate, threaten and
intimidate. Highly competitive. Avoids concessions. Can be useful in all-out wars.
Style 2:        
Usually accommodates. Can be extremely loyal and has a need to please people and to be liked. Useful for team-building and raising morale.
Style 3:
Avoids conflict.  Can be difficult to pin down to determine interests. Can be useful in avoiding unimportant disputes or petty disagreements.
Style 4: 
Triangulates conflict, talks to other people rather than the person or persons directly involved. Can be useful in building consensus among groups with little power.
Style 5: 

An effective leader approaches conflict with skill and balance. Uses other approached only when necessary after much thought.  Constantly applies the ten steps of conflict resolution.

Which one of these styles are you?

Which one of these styles is the person with whom you are currently in conflict?

What Do You Think?

Has knowing your style helped you approach conflict differently? We would love to hear your thoughts.

Did You Know
All of our leadership classes include a section on conflict. We also do specialized conflict workshops.

Call or write me to discuss your options at: 303-216-1020 or Lynne@workplacesthatwork.com

Learn more about our training offerings and check out our team members at:
Be sure to read Lynne’s book The Power of a Good Fight and learn to 
embrace conflict to drive productivity, creativity and innovation.
  
  
Workplaces That Work | (303) 216-1020 | lynne@workplacesthatwork.com
3985 Wonderland Hill | Suite 106 | Boulder, CO 80304