Do You Know the Hidden Issue Behind Your Workplace Conflicts?

Do You Know the Hidden Issue Behind Your Workplace Conflicts?

THE POWER OF BRAIN CHEMISTRY: I recently received an email from a former student wanting me to write a different kind of Monday Memo about condescending and demeaning behavior. Even though I’ve written several pieces about this issue (Do You Know Why Condescending and Demeaning Behavior Continues?), he had a different take. A former boss had given him feedback that his behavior was condescending, but he had refused to accept that feedback. Years later, he received a medical diagnosis that he suffered from being bipolar. Once receiving treatment, his condescending behavior lessened.

THE MEDICAL BACKGROUND: I believe, along with established medical science, that the brain is a part of the body and may suffer from defects like any other part of our systems. All kinds of issues, such as attention deficit disorder, clinical depression, learning disabilities, and other problems may arise. When that happens, workplace behavior problems may result; these concerns may not be correctable no matter how much training or coaching the person receives. That difficult staff member who resists your feedback may be doing the best they are able. Their failure to perform could be beyond their control – and yours.

MY OWN RESEARCH RESULTS: When I am conducting an investigation into a workplace complaint or other workplace conflict, I find that there’s an underlying brain chemistry problem in many, if not most, of these situations. I was conducting an investigation into alleged gender discrimination, for example, and the women in this group felt that they were treated differently than their male colleagues in many ways, but especially since one of them was allowed to work from home. Yet my investigation revealed that he was treated differently because he had been diagnosed as bipolar and his doctor had recommended he be allowed to work from home as a part of a reasonable accommodation plan under the Americans With Disabilities Act. Since most of these accommodations are – and should be – confidential, the women in this group had no idea that this was the reason they were being treated differently. Different treatment, yes, but not based on gender.

What Should You Do?

TAKE A HARD STAND:  If you are a leader, make sure that you enforce your organization’s policies on racist, sexist, and other kinds of unacceptable speech. While your troops might try to raise First Amendment objections, employees in private companies have limited – if any – free speech rights. You have a right to restrict unacceptable behavior at work, including speech.

DON’T LISTEN TO EXCUSES:  Groves initially tried to explain that the slur was in “every song they listened to” and was common in online and everyday speech among her peers. With kids, of course, parents might be prompted to ask whether jumping off a cliff just because musicians or peers do it would not be smart. While I am sympathetic to Grove’s suggestion that she said something wrong because she was so young (who among us hasn’t done something idiotic at 15?), the justification that entertainers or members of a certain group use unacceptable language doesn’t work in the workplace. In educational institutions, it is a sign that we need to do a better job of educating our children about our racial history and our record of injustice.

FORGET POLITICAL CORRECTNESS: People sometimes try to argue that a reaction to hate speech is just “political correctness.” Balderdash. There are standards of behavior that are simply “correct” in a civilized organization and eliminating racist language is one of them.

For more posts on racist and other inappropriate language go to Newsletter – Want to Stop Racism? Start With Yourself | (workplacesthatwork.com)

Did You Know

These and other meeting ideas are addressed in all our leadership and management workshops – live and online.

Call or write us at: 303-216-1020 or Lynne@workplacesthatwork.com

Coaching and webinars on these and other management and leadership topics can all be delivered virtually.

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Read Lynne’s book “Stop Pissing Me Off” and learn what to do when the people you work withdrive you crazy.